Relationship counselling (A guide)

Relationship counselling

In this brief blog, you will be informed about relationship counselling, the sessions in relationship counselling, and what this counselling can do for couples.

What is the definition and meaning of relationship counselling?

The definition and meaning of relationship counselling is a kind of counselling where it can provide a safe place for couples who need a place to release the tension between couples.

Some couples may feel that trying to solve the present issue will only destroy the relationship. 

This is why some couples feel that they need this kind of counselling to give them better advice on how to deal with the problem.

This kind of counselling reassures couples that there will be diplomacy in the resolution of the present issue. 

Sometimes, the partner’s different backgrounds can influence how he or she deals with an issue between a partner.

Some partners are traumatized by past trouble in their childhood years which may have influenced their toxic viewpoint in the issue. 

This kind of counselling can avoid this kind of bias in resolving the issue since this kind of bias may only help one partner aside from the couple who made this relationship in the first place.

The counsellor can help these couples to realize the goals of the relationship and the need to meet each partner’s needs in the stability of the relationship.

What happens in a counselling session for relationship issues?

After making an appointment with a counsellor specialising in relationships, you’ll be seen by a trained and experienced counsellor at one or more of the mental health centres.

You can decide if you’d like to come alone or with your partner when you visit a mental health centre for this kind of counselling.

In your first counselling session, your counsellor will question you about your relationship and what you expect to get from this kind of counselling.

These relationship counsellors might also ask you about any problems you’re experiencing, when these specific problems started and what changes you would desire to happen.

If you want to book another counselling session, your counsellor will ask you what days, times and places are best and convenient for you and you’ll talk about the cost of your relationship counselling.

You might meet only once or you might meet once a week for an extended period of time for a counselling session depending on your current relationship issues. 

The kind of relationship counselling you receive and the length of time that counselling will continue, all depends on you and what kind of relationship issues you want to address.

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Relationship counselling (A guide)

Who should relationship counselling be offered for?

Relationship counselling is for people who are having troubles with their present relationships.

You might find out that your relationship is about to run into shambles due to incessant bickering and arguing.

You might find you and your partner to lose that spark that was once in your relationship and/or find your partner being unfaithful to you which is a risk in the trust meter in the relationship.

This is why this kind of counselling is beneficial for couples who are at the brink of breaking the relationship but still conflicted in a relationship and learning what needs to be done to be more mature in handling relationship conflicts.

How does relationship therapy work in the field?

Relationship therapy works by following these standardized procedures for any kind of relationship problem presented in this kind of therapy.

Step 1 of relationship therapy

You and your partner will encounter one of the therapists for a beginning session.

This will last between 50-90 minutes but you also have the option of changing the schedule if you’re busy on that specific day. 

In this therapy session, you and your partner will be asked by the therapist on why you are starting to visit this therapy in the first place and what the ensuing problems are as of the present time that may hinder the strength of the relationship.

Also during this starting session, your therapist will brief you on what this therapy can do for you and what you need to do to reach your desired outcomes from this therapy which you can also learn more about by buying this book on this website.

Relationship counselling (A guide)

Step 2 of relationship therapy

It is the productivity that you show outside of therapy sessions that will make a significant difference to your relationship.

Depending on your beginning session, your therapist will provide you and your partner some assignments to complete before you, your partner, and the therapist will meet again. 

The assignments given by the therapist may include you and your partner’s recent conversations that may be in line with the relationship problem, your recent thoughts about your partner and your relationship, and why you want to stay in this relationship or your thoughts that you may want to leave from this relationship.

Step 3 of relationship therapy – the individual session

This step in the relationship therapy process will make you and your partner talk to the therapist alone so that the therapist can hear both separate sides of the ensuing relationship problem to give them the context of the relationship and help them understand what needs to be done.

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Relationship counselling (A guide)

Step 4 of relationship therapy

Your therapist will then meet and interact with you as a couple and present a detailed strategy and treatment protocol that will explain why you and your partner are experiencing complications in your relationship and what you can do and improve to change this complication.

Step 5 of relationship therapy – the homework session

In the course of the next 10-15 sessions, you and your partner will be assigned with projects that you need to work during therapy sessions and outside therapy sessions which can help you and your partner settle your differences in real life and help you bond together by doing the designated exercises.

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Relationship counselling (A guide)

Step 6 of relationship therapy – the final step

Once you and your partner are fulfilled that you have made a happier and more guilt-free relationship for each of you, your therapist will provide you with a number of further sessions to help and support you to stabilise these changes and deal with any teething issues.

Why do relationship issues occur in the course of tension?

Relationship issues occur in the duration of a relationship since we tend to hold expectations in the relationship and hope for something to fulfil our fantasies about a relationship.

Psychologists have found that intimacy between people can ensue a passageway towards that dark side of the partner which are the vulnerabilities that challenge the relationship.  

We tend to become hesitant when we are faced with our uncertainties and the worst but challenging part in a relationship is showing our vulnerabilities and self-doubts to our partner and the fear of rejection that will imminent once we show these characteristics of ourselves.

In a relationship, we tend to become more open even though we wish to gain any kind of approval from the partner but inevitably, we will show them our demons which we fear will end the relationship or you and your partner can face them together despite its darkness. 

When something makes us uncomfortable, it may be an external such as work stress and financial issues or internal factors such as low self-esteem, the effect is first felt and perceived in our marriage and by our husband or wife.

Several situations and causes can amount to the becoming of relationship problems such as secrets that were meant to be hidden from the partner but revealed by a threatening person.

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What are the advantages of relationship therapy?

Relationship therapy can give you the materials to you need to solve relationship issues, quickly and here are some advantages of this kind of therapy.

  • Learn methods and techniques that will assist you in finding a lasting relationship
  • Explore simple and practical actions that can help you resolve your relationship
  • Discover the hidden secrets for better communication skills to help you and your partner really understand and complement each other
  • Learn about how differences between men and women can create issues and provide solutions
  • Explore research-based techniques that can help remain long-lasting and healthy marriages and relationships
  • Discover and apply how to stop problems from breaking your relationship now or in the future

What is the expense needed for relationship counselling?

Several charities in the country offer relationship counselling and they don’t make a profit from the mental health services they provide.

Although some mental health clinics charge a fee for this kind of counselling to cover the costs of the counselling sessions. 

For instance, the Relate charity recently charge £69 for an initial consultation in this kind of counselling.

Depending on the counsellor and type of relationship counselling, the cost can range from less than $35 to $195 or more per session or from $350 to $1,950 for a set of 10 counselling sessions.

Conclusion

In this brief blog, you are informed about relationship counselling, the sessions in relationship counselling, and what this counselling can do for couples.

If you have any questions about the contents of relationship counselling, please let us know about them and we’re ready to answer.

FAQs: Relationship counselling

What is the success rate of couples counseling?

The success rate of couples counselling is 75% effective in resolving issues surrounding the couple.

This might be happening because couples who go through this kind of counselling will be able to be listened by the counsellor and they can help resolve the issues from both perspectives about the problem.

Will marriage counselors ever suggest divorce?

Marriage counsellors do not suggest divorce but if a partner is suffering abuse from a partner then the counsellor can help to obtain separation for the victimized partner.

Abuse is one of the factors that need to be addressed in divorce since this can be a plausible reason for leaving the partner.

What are signs you should get a divorce?

The signs that you should get a divorce are you are more comfortable being alone, you don’t feel comfortable with your partner anymore, you or your partner cheated, you can’t stay with your partner, you have too many trust issues with your partner, and this kind of counselling hasn’t helped you.

How do you know your marriage is doomed?

You know that your marriage is doomed when the partner is mocking you in public, you’d rather spend time alone than with your partner, you feel isolated, you’d rather focus on your career, you can’t communicate with your partner, and a partner in the relationship is not focusing on the relationship.

How often should you go to couples counseling?

You can go as often as you like to couples counselling depending on your available schedule.

This can help you progress in your relationship and help you and your partner to address the problem immediately even in your busy schedules.

Citations

Alexander Stevens Psychotherapy. Relationship counselling & therapy for couples and individuals.

Harley Therapy. Couples Counselling in London.

KlearMinds. Relationship Counselling & Coaching.

NHS. Find Relationship counselling services.

Relate. Relationship Counselling.

Tavistock Relationships. Couple Relationships Matter.

The British CBT & Counselling Service. Marriage Counselling & Relationship Therapy.

The Guardian. ‘Agreeing to therapy shows that you care’.

Relationship counselling (A guide)

Juanita Agboola

Juanita Agboola is the editor in chief of HFNE and an expert in mental health online. She has been writing about online behavior, mental health and psychology issues since 2012. All Guides are reviewed by our editorial team which constitutes various clinical psychologists, PhD and PsyD colleagues.