Making Friends with Anxiety(tips)

Making Friends with Anxiety
JuanitaHFNE

Juanita Agboola is the editor in chief of HFNE and an expert in mental health online. She has been writing about online behaviour, mental health and psychology issues since 2012. All Guides are reviewed by our editorial team which constitutes various clinical psychologists, PhD and PsyD colleagues.

In this article, titled “Making friends with anxiety,” we will present you ways that can help you make friends with anxiety and a namesake book.

Making Friends with Anxiety(tips)

Tips for Making Friends with Anxiety

Making friends with anxiety can be difficult. However, it is not impossible. The following tips may help you to make friends even if you have anxiety:

  1. Make an effort to get a little socialized. 

Sure, it is not about extreme and significant steps; you should go out with coworkers or friends, meet relatives more often than you do. It can be hard for you, but if you want to make friends making some effort and doing it, it may be useful.

  1. Do not destroy the plans. 

Destroying plans can be appealing. However, you should not do it if you are seriously interested in making new friends. If you change the plans often, you may lose that person who could become your friend.

  1. Make new friends through your old friends. 

It can be easier for you to make friends through your old friend. Even if it is hard to join group conversations, your old friend, who knows about your anxiety, can help you asking to tell a story or share your experience connected to the conversation topic. On the other side, you may feel more secure and calmer if you are in a new surroundings with a person whom you know and who knows you well.

Making Friends with Anxiety(tips)
  1. Use a mantra to calm yourself.

Find a mantra to calm yourself whenever you appear in social situations that make you stressed and anxious. The mantra can be a word or a short sentence; repeating it in your mind, may help you to calm and reenter the conversation or continue your action or activity. Going to the bathroom can be useful as well.

  1. Do not hide your anxiety.

If you want to build a long-lasting friendship, you should be honest with a person. It can be unpleasant to talk about your anxiety, but the person should know about your struggles, to have a chance to be your good friend, and support you if needed.

  1. Invite new friends to “your zone.”

Inviting your new friends to “your zone” can ease your socialization, and can be helpful in case you do not like the way your gathering goes – at least you will be in a place where you feel comfortable and better. 

  1. Do not hurry.

You should not hurry to make friends. It is possible but not a common thing to meet someone and become best friends just in an hour. You should take the time to know the person better, at the same time giving him/her a chance to know you too. It will make you feel more free and authentic, preparing the soil for a true friendship.

  1. Make people feel good around you.

Making friends with anxiety, you should make the person feel good around you. For that, you can compliment saying something nice, use the person’s name during the talk, and ask things about him/her more than telling about yourself.

Making Friends with Anxiety(tips)
  1. Do not force anything if it is not working out.

You should not force anything and trying too hard to make friends with people. Not all people can make good friends connected to their personality features and interests. So, if you try some times and it does not work out, you should stop and try to make friends with someone else. Making friends can be unexpectedly and can happen itself. 

  1. Find your passion.

To make new friends, it can be useful if you find your passion, as it can help you feel confident. Think about what you like to do, or what do you do well: dancing? Painting? Or maybe you like reading books? Choose something good and interesting for you and join a social club. There you can meet like-minded people who share your interests.

  1. Get the contact of the people you meet.

To continue communicating with the person and, maybe, making friends with him, you should ask for contact information, which can be a phone number or a social media link. It can be useful in making friends with anxiety.

  1. Choose quality over quantity.

You should not make too much effort on making many friends, or saving friendship with many friends; your anxiety itself made you worry and stressed, so why to get much more stressed and worried because of friends who are not that compatible with you, when you have one-two empathic and supportive friends.

  1. Do not be clingy.

You may want to spend more time with your friend than you do, and because he/she does not give you more time, you may complain or blame your friend for not caring about you or something else. However, remember that your friend has his/her life and cannot spend much time with you, although he/she may like and appreciate your company a lot. So, you should try to be comfortable being alone as well, besides being with your friends or other close people.

  1. Join online communities.

One of the advantages of the internet is that it gives you a chance to meet new people online. You can join online communities to meet people and make friends with like-minded individuals. Joining online communities can be much useful if, besides having anxiety, you are also an introvert.

“Making Friends with Anxiety: A warm, supportive little book to ease worry and panic.”

“Making friends with anxiety: A warm, supportive little book to ease worry and panic” is one of Sarah Rayner books. In the book, the bestselling author shares her struggle with anxiety and recovery. Rayner shows seven elements that can support anxiety, involving negative thinking and fear of the future. She also mentions the reasons that can make us worry or panic about things.

The book is written in a friendly, sympathetic way: it involves stories about the author’s life: humor, tips, exercises. Through her book, Sarah Rayner explains that when you understand that your mind and body connected, you can relieve anxiety. “Making friends with anxiety” can help you make friends with anxiety by managing your condition.

Making Friends with Anxiety(tips)

“Making Friends with Anxiety” Reviews 

“Reads like chatting with an old friend, one with wit, wisdom, and experience.” -Laura Lockington

“Sarah’s advice is very sage: if one is prone to anxiety, as many of us are, it is futile to expect to be rid of it forever. It will come back, but it is possible to tame it. She encourages the reader to be kinder to themselves, to live in the moment, and accept their anxiety as an occasionally troublesome, yet integral part of their being. Deeply personal yet eminently practical, this accessible and engaging e-book should prove extremely helpful to anyone trying to cope with anxiety.” -Dr. Ian Williams

“This is a great book: readable, practical, and, most importantly, compassionate. Sarah Rayner gives a clear explanation of the common symptoms of anxiety and panic that affect so many lives. She then goes on to give sound advice as to how to cope with these ongoing feelings. This entails a series of strategies that encourage understanding of the anxiety rather than its suppression, aiming to give control of these complex emotions back to the patient. It is impressive that she admits to her anxiety issues, and without embarrassment, shows how they have affected her life, how she has sought help over the years, and how she continues to deal with them. The fact she has written this book shows how well she has embraced her demons, able to get on with her own creative life. I will be recommending this book to my patients.” -Dr. Patrick Fitzgerald

“Simple, lucid advice on how to accept your anxiety.” -Matt Haig

\”Another short and concise book by Sarah Rayner, this time was dealing with anxiety. As an anxious person myself, I found the tips very helpful, and I can see myself listening to this book several times in the future if anxiety takes hold, and I need to feel calm. Sarah comes across as very friendly and has a very calming voice, and I liked the fact that she shared personal experiences. Thank you, Sarah.” -Sandra Leivesley

\”Great advice mixed with personal experience makes this book a must-read for anxiety sufferers. I have panic disorder and have found that many books written by so-called experts are cold and condescending. This book is like a warm hug, a cuppa, and a chat with a friend.” -Jenna

“An excellent guide for anyone who has bouts of anxiety. Rammed with helpful tips, advice, and insightful real-life experiences, this is an absolute gem. There is also a useful Facebook page to accompany the guide too.” -Laura Wilkinson

Recommended books and sources

  1. Making Friends with Anxiety: A warm, supportive little book to ease worry and panic
  2. Audiobook – Making Friends with Anxiety: A Warm, Supportive Little Book to Help Ease Worry and Panic
  3. Dare: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks
  4. Anxiety: Panicking about Panic: An authoritative, self-help guide for those suffering from an Anxiety or Panic Disorder
  5. HFNE “Anxiety Blanket”
  6. HFNE “How to Get a Service Dog for Anxiety”

Conclusion

If you have anxiety but want to make new friends, instead of despairing, you should try the tips that we suggested above; they can be helpful for you. You can also get the book written by a bestseller author Sarah Rayner, which is written in a friendly and authentic way and is aimed to help people to cope with their anxiety and panic.

Please feel free to comment on the content or ask any questions in the comments section below.

References

  1. Eight ways to make friends when you have anxiety
  2. How to Make Friends When You Have Social Anxiety

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